Kevin Federline is a Fatty

Kevin Federline, the onetime husband of pop star Britney Spears, has certainly packed on the pounds since their divorce, with the wannabe rapper nearly unrecognisable at a California sporting event on Monday.

Still with his trademark shaved head, a not-so-svelt Federline shocked onlookers at the Ryan Sheckler X Games Celebrity Classic, with one employee remarking, “Man, that’s a belly on him! That’s K-Fed?!?”

Federline, 31, was seen sipping on cocktails and smoking cigarettes with new partner, Victoria Prince, at the event on Monday; however, it wasn’t Prince who stuck up for her man, but Federline’s baby mama and ex, Shar Jackson.

“It’s daddy weight!” Jackson told Usmagazine.com. “When you are a full time parent, sometimes you can’t focus on you. If gaining a few pounds is your only problem, life’s not too bad!”

If that’s the case, then it looks like Federline needs to hang back on his caviar and champagne diet, because, like the good proverb says, less IS more. And for those of you who can’t quite remember (it’s not like Federline was an uber celebrity or anything, so you’d be forgiven if you didn’t), this is what K-Fed used to look like… back when he had plans for musical domination and all that.

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Jessica Simpson – Now With More To Love

Meet the new Jessica Simpson, now with a lot more to love.

Jessica showed off her flippers new curves at the Kiss Country Chili Cookout in Pembroke Pines, Florida on Sunday.

Looks like she chowed down on a lot of chili prior to hitting the stage.

Eva Longoria: “I’m Fat, Not Pregnant!”

Despite reports that she and hubby Tony Parker are having a baby, Eva Longoria insists that she’s not pregnant, and that her apparent weight gain isn’t a baby belly, it’s just fat.

The Desperate Housewives actress denied the pregnancy rumours on a French television show, explaining that her stomach had been growing of late because she was “packing on the pounds.”

Funny… she didn’t look very “fat” at the 9 film premiere in Paris earlier in the week.

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Kelly Blobourne Wears Spandex To Hold In Fat

This comes straight out of the ‘No Shit Sherlock’ category.

Kelly Osbourne is squidging out in so many places that normal underwear gives up the ghost and she has had to resort to wearing ‘control underwear’ to keep all the blubber in place.

Blobourne wears a full body stocking ‘practically every day’ to ensure she looks ’svelte’ under her tight dresses.

If that is svelte, I’d hate to see what she calls porky!

Kelly says:

“For a long time people have told me I’m fat and ugly and a spoiled brat. The media perceived me in a certain way and I fell into it. But I’ve changed a lot over the past year.

“Now I think before I speak. I’ve grown up a bit and I’m choosing my own career path.”

Kelly, sometimes, family and friends don’t want to tell you; it is often easier for an outsider to just come out and say it.

You’re fat.

Britney Spears Is Bigfoot

After years of speculation, I think the legend can be laid to rest.

As you can clearly see above, the famous Bigfoot photo was nothing other then Britney Spears in a gorilla suit.

You can see the same loping gate, the same chunky thighs, the same bloated stomach.

Well I am sold. Britney is Bigfoot.

Sure, there may be a discrepancy with her age and when the image on the left was taken. The only logical answer is that Britney is much older then she appears.

To see more pics of a very ‘bloated’ Britney in her bikini in Costa Rica, click the link. Read more

Star Wars – Jones And Walters Style

The gloves are off between Star Jones and Barbara Walters.

In her autobiography, Walters spilled the beans on Jones’ gastric bypass surgery and how everyone on the show had to go along with Jones’ lies that her weight loss was down to nothing more then diet and Pilates.

When confronted by Usmagazine, Jones had this to say:

“It is a sad day when an icon like Barbara Walters, in the sunset of her life, is reduced to publicly branding herself as an adulterer, humiliating an innocent family with accounts of her illicit affair and speaking negatively against me all for the sake of selling a book,” Jones told Us. “It speaks to her true character.”

Let the bitch fight begin.

Paris Says Kim’s Ass Is Gross

Ever the delightful princess, Paris Hilton just cannot help herself when it comes to bagging out anyone and everyone, no matter if they are friend or foe.

The target for Paris’ venom this time was one time bestest friend, Kim Kardashian. Speaking on a Las Vegas radio show, Paris was asked what she would prefer, Jessica Simpson’s rack of Kim Kardashian’s ass.

Answering as tactfully as she can, Paris said:

“I would not want that, that’s gross… that’s disgusting.” Then describing Kim’s ass she said.

“It’s disgusting. It reminds me of cottage cheese inside a big trash bag.”

Her irrelevance has retracted her remark, saying:

“I was just joking around and I made a stupid joke. I felt really bad afterward, so I contacted Kim and apologized. It was a silly thing to say. Kim’s hot!” Kim apparently accepted the apology.

Regulars here know that we have made one or two comments on the size of Kim’s ass, but we have never been as nasty as Paris has and we are not even Kim’s friends.

Thinking about this now, I have just had a brilliant idea, I’ll post about it soon.